Monday 16 December 2013

Religion and reproach


Traditionally, I start a blog with - 'Good evening and greetings from Inverness where I am chilling out with the contents of the snack machine in the foyer', or something similar. Tonight is different, I'm not chilling out, I'm raging. As an adult, I've learned that it's quite okay to rage, provided you guide that rage into an appropriate channel (in this case writing, though ideally a submissive) and provided you aim that rage at the appropriate parties, in other words, don't savage someone for another's misdemeanours. So, why am I angry ?

My regular readers will know of my disregard for the Irish Catholic Church, in particular when it comes to their interference in the exchange of sex for money between consenting adults behind closed doors. Frankly, it's none of their business. In fact, it's none of anyone's business provided there is no harm to either party. Unfortunately though, where there is the smell of funding or easy pickings, they will find a way to get involved, because as one of the most powerful institutions in the world, continued power is only possible with continued support and of course, money.

I have written in the past about the real identity of the anti-sex work group Ruhama in Ireland, that they are the same group of nuns responsible for the Magdalene Laundry atrocities and I've also written of their extensive wealth. It's there in black and white for anyone to see, they have had millions of Euros of Irish taxpayers money to support their 'cause'. What I've always found chilling is that they made money from the provision of new born infants to desperate couples, leaving devastated single mothers behind, even now you can still hear mothers and children searching for each other with very little information via popular Irish radio shows. It's heart breaking.

In the ultimate act of abhorrent, these religious groups are now targetting vulnerable children in an attempt to turn them against sex workers. Young Social Innovators are holding an event on December 20th, a "pay as you go rape" day of action to criminalise clients. Now, I could go into great depths about why sex work is not rape and we always have the right to say no, but that has been covered a great many times in the past by those far better informed than I. Rather, I'll take a personal look at it.

When I read the title and the ideology behind it, I flew off the handle, in typical fiery style - and I wanted to find out why that was. Firstly, I'm a mother and have worked very hard to raise an open minded, tolerant and non-judgemental child up into an admirable young woman, and thusfar, I believe I've succeeded. The notion of religous figures backing my daughter into a corner and wagging their fingers at her, telling her - 'BAD! DIRTY!' - fills me with an anger I find hard to express.

But it was more than that. As a student psychologist, I was interested in what button it had pressed in me, to make me react that way. Having given it considerable thought, I believe I have the answer. It's because this is what the church has always done, instil the fear of God into young children. So much so, that growing up I was so terrified of our local parish priest coming to examine our catechism that I threw up. I knew that if I failed I would at best, end up in limbo with unrepentant souls and babies who hadn't been baptised. At worst, it was straight to hell and into the flames of eternity. That might sound comical now, but when you're seven or eight years old and absolutely dreading your first confession, because everyone else just got two Hail Marys and you're certain you'll be on your knees to cleanse your black soul for a week, then that's terrifying.

But we've moved on from all of that, now, right? Well no, not really. Because essentially what these religious groups are doing now is the very same thing, the maxim of - 'Lie down with dogs, and you'll get fleas', applies to 'Support sex workers' rights, and you're essentially supporting paid rape'. That's wrong, particularly when they are telling those children that the average age of entry into the sex industry is just 12.

It's time to stop the lies, and I'm pleased to say that I have a project (in discussion) in the new year which will open a real discussion on the realities of the Irish sex trade to Joe Public, and it is my fervent hope that the discussion will remain in the public domain, without a church leader in sight.

LL xx

16 comments:

  1. While you may not support the methods they use, the goal of reducing vulnerable young women being exploited/forced into the sex trade is a right one. I would have thought as a mother yourself you could see this.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I have never, and would never support the exploitation or forcing of anyone into the sex trade. Never have I said that. What I do support is the differentiation between those of us who choose to work and those who are forced, be that by the hand of another or poverty. The laws being supported by these people are wrong, and as a mother - I witnessed first hand the devastating impact of the 1993 Act on a lot of people's daughters.

    ReplyDelete
  3. You are burying your head in the sand, vast majority of sex workers are forced into it. Most would not choose to have sex with complete strangers for money unless they were forced to or were in such a vulnerable position that they felt they had no choice. Paying for sex is wrong and should never be done. Those who do are incredibly selfish individuals.

    ReplyDelete
  4. If you think that the 'vast majority' are forced into it, then it is you who has a head in the san I'm afraid. I have twenty years experience which speaks to the direct opposite. Every sex worker I have ever met has been there by choice, unless of course you count poverty and drug addiction as drivers, which they are. The moral panic around trafficking and coercion is in existence for one reason and one reason only, it generates money for the rescue industry. Realism is what's required to address any social issue.

    Speaking of morals, I'm afraid you give yourself away with the phrase - 'paying for sex is wrong'. Instead of wheeling out various unfounded reasons why it shouldn't happen, why not just be honest and say you find it morally repugnant ? Disgusting even ? At least then we can have a real discussion.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I notice you are in Belfast, if I wanted to I could be having sex with you tonight, I suspect you would have no wish for this to happen yet for whatever it is you charge this would be happening. Hardly a real choice is it?

      Delete
    2. Well no, you couldn't have had sex with me last night because I was fully booked. That aside, what you're missing in discussing 'choice' is that I have the right to say no, I always have and I always will. Just because someone pays money doesn't mean they get to do what they please. Money can be refunded and they can be shown the door, I wouldn't hesitate.

      Delete
  5. @neilsgagging4it

    So, if 'paying for sex is wrong' ...is not paying for sex right?
    I wonder if all those untried priests -alive and dead- who abused their followers and students both here in Scotland and in Ireland feel they have paid for their crimes.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Plus I strongly suspect to use a favourite abolitionist phrase, that the abuses that have been uncovered thusfar are but the 'tip of the iceberg'.

      Delete
    2. Why connect these two issues? Makes no sense!

      Delete
    3. It's very straight forward really. The church has a habit of interfering in the freedoms of individuals to have consensual sex. I wish that the two were entirely separate but they're not.

      Delete
  6. The best sex is never paid for.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If you could pass *that* phone number along, I'll be forever in your debt. Thank you.

      Delete
  7. These anti prostitution groups are acting in your best interest Laura, even if you can't see it. They are working to improve the life of you and your child. Wish you could see that and instead of fighting them, help them help you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I have no doubt that *some* of the organisations do invaluable work for very vulnerable people, but I'm not one of them. If they want to help me they can stop pressing ahead for a law which will put myself and my colleagues in danger, and in allow me to work in peace.

      Delete
    2. Anonymous...don't be so ridiculous...if you are acting against an intelligent adult's will you are *NEVER* "acting in their best interests. You are just coercing them to gratify your sick needs (not every form of sick gratification involved penetrative sex).

      What kind of "help" do you suggest these paragons of busybodying have to offer Laura?

      (After her self esteem takes a swan dive off a big enough cliff to get the idiotic idea they know more about what is best for herself and her daughter than she does, which would be potentially irreparable damage in itself.

      Delete
  8. Thought you might be interested...these young folk had yet another account on Twitter and I wound up chatting with them a couple of nights ago.

    Unless it is a wind up (and who knows?) it gave me HEARTBURN. Yes they are 16, yes they are smart and able...but for crying out loud it wouldn't even be SAFE for them to "go know" the truth about any of these issues. Imagine what it would do to their minds to go digging up facts in the places I do?

    ...and hey, EXCUSE ME, isn't school supposed to be about learning how to find and assimilate facts, or did I miss that memo?

    Last time they were on twitter I saw anti guys that I have meet in real life and my whoredar found seriously creepy, and SORRY not my fault, if ALL MY ALARM BELLS WENT OFF AT ONCE, and yes you are DARN RIGHT I went straight to people in positions of authority and will happily do so again. Right or wrong, truth or propaganda, sex work is NOT a topic it is appropriate for teenage girls to be communicating about with older men.

    ...and while we are there...am I being paranoid or is such a project liable to attract the attentions of full on online weirdos?

    Do they let Benson Reilly or Moran sit and explain how traumatic it is to perform sexual acts, detailed with relish, that you would think twice about mentioning on an adult content site? Does anybody bother to consult their parents and actually explain the age inappropriate content of these "little talks"?

    I felt totally out of line for just trying to show them that the people you are supposed to be able to trust can be very corrupt. I don't think ANY sexual act is described on my blog...and I STILL felt it was all age inappropriate.

    ReplyDelete

Note: only a member of this blog may post a comment.