Monday, 10 August 2009
Holidays, Home Baking and Horrors
So I'm back from my holidays. When I say "holidays", it was more like an endurance test, not because of the people but because of the geography. I tried to cram too much into too short a time and spent so much time on the road it felt like work. I had a wonderful time though, it's like any family gathering, some you love, some you like, and some you adorn a fixed smile for in the interests of peace.
My Mother was in flying form ;
"Can you drop me to the beauty salon ? I'm running late".
"That's it, just you plough through the main street, it's me who has to live here."
"YOU JUST SAID YOU'RE RUNNING LATE AND I'M DOING 32 IN A 30 ZONE."
I had a wonderful night with my Dad. Quite unexpectedly my Mum offered to look after my little princess for the night so I drove down the country to his place and we sat up until 3.30am just talking and laughing, I can't remember the last time I felt so relaxed. It was with a heavy heart I left him.
I also spent an afternoon with my Nan which was just as I expected.
"You've lost a lot of weight, but if you lost some more you'd look great. Also, your hair is too dark, it makes you look older."
"This from an 87 year old woman in a wheel chair ? Brilliant."
The two of us fell about laughing and I was reminded for the umpteenth time that I'm the only one who gets away with that, but I knew that already. :)
Meanwhile back on the ranch, I'm at war with Royal Mail. At first they had a habit of leaving my mail on the stairs, so when someone opened the back door a tunnel effect was created and my mail blew out into the back garden. Now, they've gone one step further than that. They will come upstairs to my apartment and drop my mail on my doormat, rather than put it through the door. To me that is sheer laziness, so I put in a complaint and had a response today. For the future I fully expect my disgruntled postman to dip my mail in his morning coffee. ( At best, ho hum. )
So today I'm back on the road, WOOHOOO !! I must be the only escort I know who goes to work for a break. I'm off to Aberdeen with my fave Harlot Amanda and looking forward to it immensely. Back to PVC and perversions, I'm chomping at the bit. Speaking of chomping, Big Ric has set me a challenge. He normally books for an hour and spends most of that doing reverse oral because he loves me to squirt, but this time he has asked for 90 minutes to see if he can make me gush. I don't know if I can but it sure as hell will be fun to find out. Lovely man that he is, he sent me a list of home made cakes to choose from. I picked a fresh cream sponge as I have the feeling I'll need a sugar injection afterwards. ;)
Whilst I was on holidays, I was sitting outside a local Spar shop idly waiting for my Mum to come back out with my little princess with loads of over priced plastic toys, when I saw a rather dishevelled man from the corner of my eye. He was perched on a low window ledge and was busy removing large tufts of his hair and moustache with what looked like a pliers and placing them very carefully in an empty coffee cup. I thought to myself ( and not for the first time ) how as much as we seek to complain about our daily lives, to coin a very old but very true saying, there is always someone worse off.